Sometimes I blog about the lamest things. TV shows, plants, pillows. This blog started because of this girl and wanting to capture every little thing she did in some sort of journal. But over time life happens and her 'first time eating sushi' or her 'stage of spitting' isn't documented and we just laugh about it and live in the moment - and then I come home and do a post about how I could live in pottery barn.
I hope when I finally getting around to printing 'the blog' and Lucy grows up and reads it she won't wonder why every post on 'lucy bug's life' wasn't about lucy. I hope she'll have 50 gazillion fun memories and even if I slacked off on documenting everything - her cute little photographic mind will remember the rest.
I guess I'm just feeling nostalgic because she's growing up so damn fast. Lucy wrapped up her last lesson in dance class today - another year down. Dance this year was the first time I dropped her off with someone else for an hour. This fall that one hour will turn into three when I drop her off for preschool - and I really don't know how I'll handle it. Lucy is so beyond ready for school and a fully-booked social calendar. She is four and needs friends, teachers, learning and I guess a little time away from me. She will be so ready this September but I won't. I had a mini panic attack in bed the other night realizing that once I get through preschool then the next year she'll be gone EVERY SINGLE (week) DAY. Doesn't that seem a bit much?! Five years old and going to school five days a week!
Ugh. The hard part of this is that the three of us are all so close and Lucy is a child-spy (like I was) and can sense any emotion, anxiety or unsettledness. Blake and I can be having a conversation and we think she's completely immersed in her own little activity and then she comes and recites word for word what we said (of course, adding in her opinion too). So I guess I have to drive up the canyon and cry and scream and freak out to not upset her.
Part of this anxiety could be because I probably will only do this once. That's another blog post altogether or possibly one that will never get published but Blake and I really like having our one perfect girl so it's not like I have 6 other babies in diapers I can focus on. My one perfect, delicious, amazing baby is growing up - and that's that.
I hope this is just an emotional phase I'll get over but it's bittersweet. And a little more bitter than sweet today.
5 comments:
Just keep enjoying every minute you have because time goes by so quickly. Lucy is going to love school! I can't wait to see how she grows and makes friends. A new phase, but a fun one!
i am hearing your pain.....even though i have 3 kids, it still feels the same.
i love that she picks up on everything too, such a smart little cookie.
school is awesome! next time I see you Ill have to show you my blog books. Youll love them.
Codi! I was hanging on every word you said. I've been having similar emotions about Crosby and he's a year behind her... already started with some tears and he won't even be in preschool for another year, oh my.
Yes, go up the canyon and scream... been there done that and you'll feel better as long as you grab a Coke at Mickey D's on the way home to soothe your throat.
Love that Luce! Here's to FUN times ahead for the three of you.
Love you!
I just registered Sam today for preschool, and I'm already filled with anxiety. It didn't help that when I was talking to Sam about the registration, he stopped and said, "I'm going to miss you, Mommy." How did we get such smart kiddos?
I can't believe your Little Miss is already 4. How can we slow down time?
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